How's Your Self-Worth?

How I see myself, what I think about myself, how I feel about myself, and how well I accept myself will largely determine what I get out of life. If I see myself as having little worth, I will never achieve my God-given potential. But if I see myself as having great value, not in a prideful way, but as God sees and accepts me, I will, with God's help, be able to reach and achieve my God-given life purpose and potential.

Take a bar of iron and make it into nails and it will be worth a few dollars; make it into weight bearing posts it will be worth much more; refine it and make it into stainless steel pots and it will be worth even more; or refine it even further to take out all its impurities and use it to make finely tuned space age rocket engines and it will be worth a fortune.

Life's like that. If you believe in yourself in a healthy sense, with God's help and his "refining fire" (plus a lot of hard work), you can become the person God envisions you to be, and be able to fulfill your God-given life purpose.

What is important is not how or where we got started in life, but how and where we finish! We had no choice in the former, but we do in the latter.

Dear God

please help me

to see and accept myself

as you see and accept me,

and put me through your 'refining fire'

so that I will reach and achieve

my total God-given potential 

 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

Looking Back to Go Forward

You've no doubt read that if flies are placed in a jar with air holes in the lid, they will fly around frantically, banging into the lid, desperately trying to escape from their prison. However, if left there long enough, eventually they will stop banging into the lid. Later, if the lid is removed, they won't even try to escape. Somehow they have been conditioned "to believe" that there is no escape. They just keep circling in the cramped jar.

Some of us are like that. Somewhere in our past, through a bad experience, perhaps in a bad marriage, or as a teenager or child we were hurt and have been "conditioned" to believe that there is no escape, so we are afraid to try again for fear of failure or of getting hurt again.

To overcome, one needs to acknowledge where and how in the past he or she had been hurt, express the hurt, anger and/or grief creatively if these feelings exist, and then let go of them so he/ she can go forward into the future unencumbered by his or her past.

Repressing or denying feelings doesn't get rid of them. It only adds interest to them and makes things worse in the long run. Negative emotions need to be expressed verbally (or written out) in a creative manner. With grief we need to sob it out until it is all gone. That's what tears are for. For some of us skilled counseling may be needed to help us re-connect to our super-charged repressed negative and damaged emotions, and to express them creatively.

Once this is done, forgiveness becomes possible, which we need to grant to anyone who ever hurt us. Only then can we be freed from the past and put it behind us. And then, if there is still fear of being hurt again, acknowledge the fear but choose not to allow it to control you. With God's help step out and try, try, try again until you succeed in what it is you want to do, or better still, to do what you believe God wants you to do.

Dear God

please help me

to resolve any hurts

from the past

that are affecting my life

in any negative way

and help me

to forgive

any and all

who have ever hurt me

And help me

to seek forgiveness

where I have hurt others

so I can put all these things

behind me

forget them

and be free

to fully live

and fully love

 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

Successful Failures

Today's society places tremendous emphasis on physical appearance not only for women, but also (even if to a lesser degree) for men. If, for example, two men of equal qualifications apply for the same job, the tallest man is most likely to be chosen for the position.

Because of his amazing courage in the Battle of Lodi in 1796, Napoleon Bonaparte became known as "the little corporal." He was only five-feet-two-inches tall !

William Wilberforce was another small man who apparently never enjoyed good health. For twenty years he was under a doctor's care. More than any other person he was responsible for stopping the British slave trade. He was known for his eloquence and in 1780 entered the British Parliament at age 21. Six years later he joined Thomas Clarkson, the anti-slave campaigner, and began his fight against slavery even though the bill to end the slave trade didn't become law until 1807—twenty-one years later.

On one occasion James Boswell, the great Scottish author went to hear Wilberforce speak. Afterward he said, "I saw what seemed to be a mere shrimp …  but as I listened, he grew and grew till the shrimp became a whale."

Often in life, many of the greatest achievements have been accomplished by persons who have had a serious setback, a major limitation or handicap, or a significant failure of one kind or another, but have overcome their defect to rise above their circumstances.

If you feel you have a shortcoming, be encouraged, the people God uses are ordinary people who make themselves available.

Dear God

thank you

that you use

ordinary people

to accomplish

your work on earth

 

I am available.

 

Please make me usable,

and use me to be a part

of what you are doing

in the world today.

 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

Being Connected

Unfortunately, many people are taught to ignore their negative emotions. As John T. Raffa wrote in Psychology for Living magazine: "They believe you should hide such feelings—deny, deny, deny—and become nothing but a robot instead of what God made us, beings with feelings."

Repressed people are closed people and are unable to fully love and fully live. Neither can they have any kind of emotional intimacy in marriage and close relationships.

Only as we walk in the light, that is, in honesty and openness, are we able to have true fellowship and connection with both God and others. Furthermore, only then are we able to be open channels through which God's love can flow to others, and in so doing will we be able to fully live and fully love.

Dear God,
please reveal to me
any and every barrier
in my life
that blocks my feeling
close to you and to others
so that I can know true intimacy
with you and the ones I love the most—
and be a vibrant channel
through which your love to others can flow.

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

On Guard

Roger Perkins wrote how he "once encountered a ruffled grouse in the woods of Montana. She was close and feigned having a broken wing and unable to fly. She would run ahead of me and look back to make sure I followed. Her purpose was to lead me away from her chicks who were somewhere nearby, although I couldn't see them. This is a common ploy among mother wild game birds. I am capable of the same thing in my life and have done it on occasion. I have to keep on constant guard."  

What Roger is saying is that it is very easy to be led astray by rationalizing tempting thoughts and allowing them to lead us astray, and then justifying our actions when we chose to do something that we know in our heart is wrong.

We need to be constantly on guard against our own deceptive thoughts, rationalizations, and actions because Satan will never give up on seeking to lead us away from God. "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour."

F.R.I.E.N.D.Z

Do Your Best

"When Leonardo da Vinci was still a pupil, his elderly, well-known teacher asked him to finish a painting that he, the teacher, had begun.

"Young da Vinci stood in such awe of his master's skill that at first he respectfully declined. But his teacher would accept no excuse. He simply said, 'Do your best.' Trembling, da Vinci took his brush and began. With each stroke, his hand grew steadier as the genius within him awoke. Soon he was so caught up in his work that he forgot his timidity. When the painting was finished, the frail and weak master was carried into the studio to see it. Embracing his student, he exclaimed, 'My son, I paint no more!'

Not everyone has the kind of talent and genius that Leonardo da Vinci had, but every one of us has God-given talents that he wants us to develop. He never expects from us what he hasn't gifted us to do. And he has already equipped us to do what He wants us to do. So use what talents you possess. Do your best and leave the rest to God. As Henry van Dyke said, "The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best."

Dear God

thank you

for the talents

you have given to me.

 

Please help me

to see what they are,

develop them fully,

and use them

to the best of my ability

 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

Outrunning Who ?

It's an old story but worth repeating: Two friends are hiking in the woods when they come upon a menacing-looking bear walking directly toward them. When one fellow starts to slowly remove his backpack, the other whispers, "What are you gonna do?"

"I'm going to run for it," was his reply.

"But you can't outrun a bear," his pal protested.

"I don't have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun you."

As Michael Josephson said in his weekly column, "Everywhere we see people living their lives according to this Darwinian law of the jungle. They see everything as a competition just to find the most extreme tactics to assure their own survival. You've heard the rationales: 'It's a dog-eat-dog world,' 'Eat or be eaten,' 'You've got to look out for Number One.'"

Wrong! These people end up only outrunning themselves—even if it is eventually!

People who believe in and live by this dog-eat-dog philosophy will die by this philosophy. As it has been said, "Those who live by the sword will die by the sword." And what is the point of being the richest or most successful person in the grave ? The reality is that we can't take what we gained with us when we die.

But if we honor others, we can send ahead all that we have legitimately gained—as an investment in eternity—and therein store up riches in heaven.

Dear God

please deliver me

from ever participating

in this 'dog-eat-dog' mentality and practice.

 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer.

Where Are the Nine ?

"You probably read about Paddy who was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place.

"Looking up to heaven he said, 'Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish whiskey.'

"Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

"Paddy looked up again and said, 'Never mind, I found one.'"

While we make jokes about such things, I wonder how often I pray, God answers, and I forget to say thank you … or fail to even see that God has answered my prayer because it wasn't in the way that I expected it to be.

The fact is, when my prayer is sincere from the heart, God always hears and answers it. Sometimes the answer is "Yes," sometimes it is "No," and sometimes it is "Wait a while." And sometimes it is in a way that is totally different from what I expected.

The important thing is that we always thank God for hearing and answering our prayers regardless of the way in which they are answered, because God always knows what is best for us.

Dear God
thank you
that you always hear
and answer my prayers
in one way or another.
May I always have a grateful heart
and learn to thank you regardless of the way
in which you answer my prayer.

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

The Power of Tears

Walter Wangerin in his book, The Manger Is Empty, "has a wonderful story, called 'Matthew, Seven, Eight, and Nine' about how he tried to stop his son Matthew from stealing comic books. He tried various uses of the law over several years and continued to fail. Finally, he resorted to something he rarely used: a spanking. He did it deliberately, almost ritualistically, and he was so upset when he finished that he left the room and wept. After pulling himself back together, he went in to Matthew and hugged him. 

"A number of years later, Matthew and his mother were doing some general reminiscing, and Matthew happened to bring up the time when he kept stealing comic books. 'And you know why I finally stopped?' he asked. 'Sure,' she said, 'because Dad finally spanked you.' 'No!' replied Matthew, 'No, because Dad cried.'

Dear God

thank you 

that you know 

and understand me 

more than anyone else ever could, 

and that you care deeply for me. 

Please help me 

to grasp the fullness 

of your love and concern 

and learn to trust in you 

implicitly no matter what. 

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz

Discipline vs. Punishment

Nine-year-old Al had disobeyed his father who, as a strict disciplinarian, sent him with a note to a police station in London. When Al came in late after curfew, his father met him at the door and handed him a note and said, "Take it to the jailhouse."

Al was terrified.

"The officer, a friend of his father, opens the note, reads it, and nods,. 'Follow me.' He leads the wide-eyed youngster to a jail cell, opens the door, and tells him to enter. The officer clangs the door shut. 'This is what we do to naughty boys,' he explains and walks away ... The jail sentence lasts only five minutes. But those five minutes felt like five months. Al never forgot that day. The sound of the clanging door, he often told people, stayed with him the rest of his life.

"The fear of losing a father's love exacts a high toll. Al spent the rest of his life hearing the clanging door. That early taste of terror contributed to his lifelong devotion to creating the same in others. For Al—Alfred Hitchcock—made a career out of scaring people."

True, discipline is important, but it always needs to fit the crime. Some children are impaired for life because of severe punishment as a child. Others are left terrified if they were beaten severely or abused. It is imperative that parents never discipline out of anger because that is punishment, not discipline. Discipline always needs to be in love. 

Those whom God loves, he disciplines in love—not punishes in anger. We need to do the same with our children.

Dear God
thank you that when you discipline me
it is always out of your love for me and for my good

Help me
to do the same
when disciplining my children.
May it always be in love and never out of anger.

Thank you for hearing and answering my prayerz